Parents are quite a new experience. For the most part, the apple doesn't seem to fall far from the tree. Some of my kids are the absolute best that any parent could hope for, but there is the other end of the spectrum as well.
Parents are definitely in a different class by themselves. The parent/teacher conferences that I have had have been interesting to say the least. What the students tell the parents and then what the parents tell the teachers are usually very different stories. The parents I have dealt with have been very cooperative and good to work with. In fact we even have some of the parents email addresses and are encouraged to let them know when we have a problem with their child. This has been a great help.
Parents are definitely in a different class by themselves. The parent/teacher conferences that I have had have been interesting to say the least. What the students tell the parents and then what the parents tell the teachers are usually very different stories. The parents I have dealt with have been very cooperative and good to work with. In fact we even have some of the parents email addresses and are encouraged to let them know when we have a problem with their child. This has been a great help.
But when you get to talk to those effective parents, it is all worthwhile. I had a student who was a little too stuck on himself...until I talked to his parents. Now he is as well behaved as they come. When in doubt, call the parents, especially at work. When they hear their kids are acting up or not working hard, they will adjust the problems you can't!
I too have had extensive conversations with parents, interesting enough, only of my 10th graders. I have no real reason to talk to the parents of my other classes -- they are are well adjusted, or if they are not, the parents are the source of the problem, not the solution. But for the overwhelming majority, the parents have been wonderful. The first phone call I made was on Sept.11. A student was really acting up (prior to us hearing about the tragedy) and pulling all the "substitute" tricks on me. (My coop was in Chicago.) When I talked to Angela (coop) on the phone, she said call his mom, that will straighten him out. I did, and the next morning the student apologized to me. I call parents for students acting up, and have yet to be forced to write a d-note. I call parents when I am concerned about a grade. And I call parents when I have an outstanding student. You will cannot imagine how wonderful this can make you feel. Parents are usually only contacted when something is wrong. Parents of good students almost never hear from teachers. I called several it and it just made every one feel great: me, the student, and the parent. I am lucky -- I have wonderful, supportive, caring parents. They help make my job easier.
I teach the magnet program at my school, so the students are driven, motivated to learn, and concerned about their grades. I have observed that, in most cases, this is a direct result of parent involvement. And while this is positive and encouraging and helpful in my classes, it has almost proved detrimental from an administrative point of view. I (or my coop teacher, who is new to the magnet program) have never been so inundated by parent emails, phone calls, and in-class visits. There is a constant request for conferences, regardless of how the student is performing. There is a constant berage of "constructive criticism"- you give my child too much homework, you give my child too much work and this is a Muslim holiday, your tests are too hard, etc., etc! They are OVERLY proactive and have a comment about EVERY LITTLE THING!! There are trying to dictate what goes on in MY classroom, and I wish they would let teachers just do their job! I know this sounds crazy, because I have been "trained" in school on ways to involve parents and ways to communicate with them so they will be more supportive, but I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would have to be fending them off. While most are trying to be helpful and trying to protect their poor helpless child, others feel they are superintendent or my boss. We have tried to come up with ways to alleviate the situation, i.e., make parents feel they are respected and helpful, but that they are not in charge- this has been difficult. Any ideas would be appreciated!
Back from Thanksgiving and the semester is almost over at the expense of numerous hours of lost sleep, scores of cuban cigars, an untold gallons of various adult beverages (mainly scotch), and more time questioning my abilities and actions than I can remember. In spite of all of these things I think I am going to miss the little brats (not too sure how descriptive I can be on this message board, so brats will suffice.).
I just made 20 parent phone calls. What an
In the few parent-teacher conferences I have taken part in, I find that some parents do have the power to make changes in the lives and attitudes of their children. This of course is our hope when we run out of "teacher tricks", and sometimes it really works. There are others though whit whom it does not work. These parents either seem to simply not care or are in complete denial as to the wicked trick that the gene pool coulped with poor parenting has pulled on them. This is the one that concerns me most and I have the most difficulty figuring out how to deal with.
By Mary McAllister (Usc_mcallister) on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 10:59 am:
I know that some teachers do not have the cooperation of the parents, but I feel lucky that I have parents that do want to get involved with the teachers.
By Mary McAllister (Usc_mcallister) on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 11:15 am:
I know that some teachers do not have the cooperation of the parents, but I feel lucky that I have parents that do want to get involved with the teachers.
By Andrew Higginbotham (Usc_higinbotham) on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 09:01 pm:
By Laura Eckard (Usc_eckard) on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 05:36 am:
By Elizabeth Milliken (Usc_milliken) on Tuesday, November 27, 2001 - 04:21 pm:
By Matt "Casey" McBrayer (Usc_mcbrayer) on Tuesday, November 27, 2001 - 10:20 pm:
This has proven to be the most educational part of being an "educator" I have encountered to date.
Also plan to buy stock in Jack Daniels and Budweiser. There are a bunch of teachers out there and you can bet they need a little relief from time to time. The pay isn't enough to afford the good stuff, but the position requires that one put forward at least an attempt at an affluent image.
Seriously, it has been quite a worthwhile experience, made easier knowing that there were others experiencing similar victories and defeats, and able to share them in class or over a meal and a beer at a restaurant. Thanks and good luck to all.
Now before I once again snatch defeat from the mouth of victory I will end my message.
Cheers,
Casey
By Jennifer McLeod (Usc_mcleod) on Wednesday, November 28, 2001 - 06:43 pm:
ordeal. I thought this would be no problem. All
I had to do is the the parents there students
have the inability to turn in assignments. Well,
out of the 20 calls, only about 10 numbers
worked. The rest were dissconnected. How
can the school have so many numbers that do
not work. How can we be held accountable if
we can not rely on the administration to have
proper numbers. I did get through to a few and
the parents were great. I even had a parent
call be back. I did not leave a number to be
reached at on the message, but with
technology she responded immediately. The
students who were reached have had an
immediate improvement. We will see how
long this lasts.